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But I Didn't Mean That!: How to Avoid Misunderstandings And Hurt Feelings in Everyday Life  
Richard Heyman , June Paris , Rachel Small
2007
ISBN: 1572244887
English
168 pages
PDF,MOBI,EPUB
1.29 MB


If you don't do it yourself, you certainly know someone who is forever putting a foot into his or her mouth. This person has raised the tasteless, thoughtless, tactless, or otherwise terrifically awful remark into an art form. If there is a wrong place, a wrong time, or a wrong person to whom to say anything, they're on the spot and on the ready. And though we can joke about it (at the right time, of course), careless speech is no laughing matter. Words really can hurt-not only the person at whom they're aimed but the speaker, too, whose relationship, career, and social prospects can all suffer as a result of unmindful speech.

Fortunately, this book can help even the most scandalous mis-speaker. It outlines six simple questions, called Q-Points (Questions of Positive Thinking and Speaking) for readers to keep in mind before they speak. Who am I speaking to? What am I not seeing? Where will my words get me? How will the other person react to my words? When do I say it? And why must I say it at all? By coming up with an answer in the moment before speaking, anyone can start to avoid terrible slips in speaking judgment that can hurt themselves and others. But I Didn't Mean That! analyzes the most problematic speaking situations to show how the Q-points can be used to start conversing with empathy, confidence, and unimpeachable tact.

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Feeling Hurt in Close Relationships (Advances in Personal Relationships)

2009
by Anita L. Vangelisti
548 pages
Publisher: Cambridge University Press; 1 edition
Language: English
ISBN-10: 0521866901
ISBN-13: 978-0521866903

Feeling Hurt in Close Relationships presents a synthesis of cutting-edge research and theory on hurt. Being hurt is an inevitable part of close relationships. What varies from relationship to relationship is not whether partners hurt each other, but how their relationship is affected by hurtful episodes. Given the potential influence of hurt feelings on people's interpersonal relationships, it is not surprising that scholars have begun to study the antecedents, processes, and outcomes associated with hurt. This collection integrates the various issues addressed by researchers, theorists, and practitioners who study the causes of hurt feelings, the interpersonal events associated with hurt, and the ways people respond to hurting and being hurt by others. To capture the breadth and depth of the literature in this area, the work of scholars from a variety of disciplines - including social psychology, communication, sociology, and family studies - is highlighted.

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